Joan Rivers Tells Posh To Fuck Off

This picture of Joan Rivers melting in NYC today paired with this quote she gave to Closer Magazine is getting me drunk. It’s like a hilarious cocktail followed by a cunt chaser. It will get you drunk too, so tell your designated driver they are officially on-call. Open up, and drink up, you whore pit viper:

“Victoria Beckham is so nasty. Why doesn’t she just go home?! Her dresses are beautiful, but I don’t care what she does. She’s mean to all the people around her. She’s too short to be a diva. We all use the same hairdressers, make-up artists, limo-drivers and greeters at the airports in LA and nobody has anything nice to say about her. They say she’s rude. She can’t always just be having a bad day. Victoria Beckham should get a life. I am not a fan of outrageous consumption. I think it is vulgar.

And no-one should flaunt that they have a hundred Hermes bags. Not when people are starving. Everyone should be allowed to have a great time but she shows a distinct lack of class. I dislike Victoria Beckham. The entitlement – the total entitlement. You want to say, ‘Calm down, you were a Spice Girl.’ The arrogance when she walks into a room is astonishing.“

Image via INFDaily.com – Quote via SMH (Does Not Stand For “Shaking My Head”)

The Betty White/Quween Feud Lives On

Last week, Betty White and Quween on the Scene had a little quarrel outside of the Beverly Hills Medical Center. I was hoping that they would make up over shots of Mad Dog in the parking garage, but obviously that didn’t happen. By the looks of these pictures taken yesterday, Quween is no longer a friend of Betty’s, just like sanity is no longer a friend of OctoMom’s.

This hurts deep. Just look at Betty making painfaces! I make the same face when I accidentally look down while taking a shower by myself. It’s like Quween’s presence is giving her an awesomely horrible case of gas.

You know that one episode of Dateline NBC about telemarketing scams that target the elderly? This looks like a dramatization of that episode. This is not a good sign at all.

I don’t want to have to spend weekends at Quween’s corner, and weekdays at Betty’s house, so I hope this all blows over soon. Whenever you piss off a Golden Girl, just put a cheesecake on her porch and back off. Well, unless it’s Blanche, and then you just slip a hot man in her mail box.

You’re A Mean One, Janet J

Okay, to be fair to Janet Jackson, she only looks like she snarls at the Whos while perched atop Mount Crumpit in the picture above. In the rest of the pictures, she doesn’t look like she’s going to snatch away Christmas anytime soon. The photographer just caught her at her grinchiest moment.

Here’s more pictures of Janet at London Fashion Week looking aaaaaaaaalmost as naturally gorgeous as La Toya (I don’t mean that, La Toya). Janet was also lucky enough to pose with the sexy matchstick known as Tilda Swinton.